He Mau Hali'a Aloha

He Mau Hali'a Aloha

na beatrice mahi ravenscraft

When I considered Pu'uhonua 'O Honaunau, I thought of nā wa kahiko, the times of old. The word “refuge” conjured up images of people desperately seeking preservation of their life; this one safety valve to counter the unfortunate circumstances of their existence. Faced with the threat of eminent death, could I have survived? I appreciate and respect the strict regiment of the society of ancient times, then suddenly, I fast forward...

...My head swirled with cherished memories of happy times at Honaunau. I remembered scampering across the ripples of black pahoehoe, strong, nimble, sure footed, and eager to soar as the iwa bird. I remembered wading, splashing, laughing in the cool fresh waters of the baby pool; fingers of the warm sunlight caressing my shoulders. I remembered sheer delight as we peeked into crab holes, water gushing through revealing the mottled blue, green, pink, and gray of the living coral beneath. I remembered, suddenly a tiny face appeared, with poppin eyes patiently waiting for the sea to return. Could it have been a stout moray, pūhi, dark brown with numerous small light yellow spots? Or was it a snowflake moray, pūhi-kāpā, covered in black blotches containing tiny yellow dots? They looked so similar. I remembered the perfect ledge dad found for Ka'io and me to dive off of into the azure sandy depths below, then we waited for the perfect swell to lift us gently back on to the ledge. If the tide was low, there was another platform submerged about a foot below the water's surface. I remembered the times dad caught a banded shrimp, hermit crabs and other little critters right there in the deep crevice to add to our salt-water tank.

Then when Ka'io got to seventh grade, he earned his junior scuba diver's license. We began swimming in the little Honaunau bay with the boat ramp; the waters there were well protected for the beginner scuba diver. Aue no ho'i! It was crowded, and the sea life was not so abundant. So when Ka'io was strong enough to manage the apparatus and gear, we moved back out to the open depths of the rough sea. That truly was the best hangout; many happy hours at one with the waters of Honaunau.

Majestic kiawe trees lined the sandy beach spreading a lacy canopy of shade over the picnic tables. Dad lit the charcoal on the firepit. With Tutu, only seasoned kiawe wood completed the job to perfection; she threw sugarcane on the wood to give it a sweet smoky flavor. When the grill was primed, hotdogs and peppery seasoned hamburgers, or Portuguese sausage and teriyaki meat, or oysters on the half shell and teriyaki chicken were charbroiled to a delicate crisp. No picnic was complete without a variety of chips, finger veggies and ranch dip, potato/mac salad, musubi with ume, daikon and kim chee. Oh! Marshmellows on a guava stick, those were indispensable treats.

When dinner was pau, everything cleaned up, the truck packed, and the coals snuffed out with sand, we watched the sun dip behind the horizon. The sky turned shades of orange-red, pale blue to purple then black as sparkling diamonds filled the darkness one by one. Finally, dad turned the engine over, and we putt-putted our way along the gravel road.

To our son Conall Kahaka'ioikamālie Ravenscraft, may you find your way back to your island home, kou one hānau.

Annotated Bibliography

Annotated Bibliography

Baines, L., (September 2001). Out of the box. Voices From the Middle, vol. 9, no. 1. Retrieved from http://www.ncte.org/library/NCTEFiles/Resources/Journals/VM0091-sept01/VM0091Out.pdf

The author, Lawrence Baines, is a professor of Education at Texas Tech University at Lubbock, Texas; he ran an experiment with a group of remedial high school students who were unable to pass the state assessment. Knowing that the old school methods were not reaching these students, he set out to find a way to connect with this high-risk group and help them make sense of their learning. Baines used powerpoint, pictures and music to hook students into the poetry writing process. After writing a poem, they enhanced their piece with images and background music to help them improve their word choice. By setting images to each phrase then choosing the music to coincide with the word phrases and images, students were able to refine their word choices to the best that they could do. When students have more ways to connect to the text, it helps them to understand their ideas with a clearer sense.

Fay, M., (May 2001). Music in the classroom: an alternative approach to teaching literature. Teaching English in a Two-Year college, Retrieved from

http://www.ncte.org/library/NCTEFiles/Resources/Journals/TETYC/0284-may01/TE0284Music.pdf

Marion Fay, an English teacher at the College of Alameda in San Francisco and a producer of concert series, advocates the use of specific kinds of music to enhance literature and bring more clarity and understanding to the reader. This is especially effective in classrooms that have a diversity of students by age, abilities, culture, race, and life experience; music helps to bridge that gap. Music, indeed, is a universal language and can touch a unified chord to bring people together at times. Applying a multi- disciplinary approach is recommended to maximize the learning. In the article are many good suggestions of music selections with the accompanying literature piece, however they are not grade specific.

Krammer, J., (January 2002). From John Donne to the last poets: an eclectic approach to poetry. English Journal. Retrieved from http://www.ncte.org/library/NCTEFiles/Resources/Journals/EJ/0913jan02/EJ0913From.pdf

The author, Joel Krammer, along with four of his 12^th grade English teacher colleagues at Maria Carrillo High School in Santa Rosa, California collaboratively planned and implemented a new approach to a poetry unit. Their main goal in this two month long unit was to engage students in the process of listening, reading, creating, performing, interpreting, and responding to poetry in ways they had never done so before. There were core elements including the collection of poems used for text that they planned together, but they maximized their effectiveness by taking advantage of each teachers strengths, varying the assignments, using music, bringing local poets, having on-line sharing and critiquing, and staging a poetry slam to culminate the unit. While there were minor issues with a wide range of abilities, they broke free from the barrier that poetry was for the elite as students were excited and engaged in poetry even beyond the regular assignments, and many students continued on-line even after graduation. There were well over 3000 postings from a class of more than 300 seniors. The slam was the final icing on the cake as students took personal pride in their staged performances. It is true that when students are excited and actively involved their learning increases and their self-esteem is better.

Kryder, J. B., (September 2006). Discovering the inclusive art of poetry. English Journal, vol. 96, no. 1. Retrieved from http://www.ncte.org/library/NCTEFiles/Resources/Journals/EJ/0961-sept06/EJ0961Discovering.pdf

The author is a teacher at Williamsville East High School, co-founder and co-director of Collaborations and Connections, the Buffalo/Williamsville Poetry, Music, and Dance Celebration, and his poems are published in the Del Sol Review, the Alembic and the Buffalo News. In addition, he has 5 poems put to music by high school, college, and professional musicians. He wrote a poem for Dr. Stephen Shewan's choral and orchestral work the “Hymn for Spring” published by Albany records. John Kruder asserts that interdisciplinary collaborative projects are at the cutting edge of education at its best, considering the tremendous success with the Poetry, Music, and Dance Celebration for many years. He believes that educators, schools, and districts should keep the communication lines open and be willing to take risk in finding new and better ways to engage their students, thereby raising their understanding and appreciation of all the art forms and how the arts relate to other disciplines like math and science. His research and innovative projects in the schools also shows that they can breakdown barriers and bring inner-city and suburban students together in meaningful ways. I believe if we could work together like this, we could be much more effective with our students.

Tarasiuk, Tracy., (March 2009). Extreme poetry: making meaning through words, images, and music. View from the Middle, vol. 16, no. 3. Retrieved from http://www.ncte.org/journals/vm/issues/v16-3

Tracy Tarasiuk, a reading specialist at Park Campus School in Round Lake, Illinois implemented a Poetry unit using podcast where she could post her middle school students' multimedia projects. In incorporating music, students used GarageBand to create the music to accompany their poetry. That's when she created Extreme Poetry, the main goal was for her students to be able to find meaning and interpret the authors' poetry, to respond, to apply techniques and to share their own works on the podcast. The addition of music inspired a closer connection to their own poetry in ways they hadn't imagined. Authentic feedback from their peers motivated them to continue more successfully with greater force than with feedback from a teacher.

Inside Out: chapter 13 crafting essays

Inside Out Strategies for Teaching Writing

Chapter 13: Crafting Essays

I still dread the infamous essay paper after 32 years of teaching and a masters degree. As the chapter states, it's no wonder that our students slump into their seats upon hearing about the next essay assignment. The way we learned to write expository text is outdated resulting in a piece that is disconnected and boring. Enter the contemporary essay fresh and alive in new innovative ways that show the enthusiasm of the author and connects with its audience.

There are three areas of expository writing that need clarification; the topic, voice , and form. Too often teachers would assign topics that students could not connect with. Students need to be allowed to explore and find an area that interest them. In the past, we were suppose to write in the third-person, again not having a positive impact on the audience. The form of the writing would be to restricting; students would focus on form and lose sense of the content and message. This chapter asserts that teachers need to apply the same traits of writing that we use in narratives and poetry.

There many different forms that can be applied to essay writing. I will touch on a few of the strategies and forms mentioned in the chapter. In this age, we have the virtual tour to take us through places and experiences we would not otherwise know at the click of a button. Therefore the virtual experience is a great way for students to imagine themselves entering an unknown world. We would provide the stimuli to get them hooked. With photography, art, news sources, fiction, poetry artifacts and more students can see things in a different perspective, through a different lenses from what they are accustom to. We would help them create little vignettes or scenarios for them to walk through and learn from.

Storyboards are also visual ways to help students organize, see long term, map out a process. Metaphors, analogs, and stories allow students to connect based from where they came from to where they are going. We can see from the view point of their culture, ethnicity, and life experiences. Speculative pieces follow the inquiry method and encourage students to ask questions and seek out answers.

There are critiques and reviews, editorials, historical pieces, and anthropological studies, investigative reports and so many more styles to get students to turn on to their learning so that they would be willing to write about it. Always encourage our students to use their own language in a way that makes the subject real to them and so it touches their readers in a meaningful positive way.

Inside Out: chapter 10 Revision

Inside Out Strategies for Teaching Writing

Chapter 10: Revision: The Student as Editor

This chapter clearly confirms all th painful realities of getting students to revise their work. We go through the steps, but as the chapter says just as many papers get worst as those that improve. There are several key issues.

Writing is a recursive process, always looping back to address an issue here or there. As writers, we work in chunks, checking spelling , rethinking, rearranging, “tinkering” as the author says. As fluent writers, we do it in a quick timely manner as the ideas are fresh. We're multi-tasking, something difficult for students as they are often scattered. So how to teach this process? There are four steps; in-process revision, re-vision, editing and proofreading. It is necessary to focus on each part separately to teach students.

In-process revision. This is the difficult one because as the writing proceeds a good writer looks back, fixes if need, looks forward to see where its going. They fine tune the writing and examine if the voice is clear and if the thoughts flow easily. Teach students to read with a pencil and model the act of breaking down and notating changes.

Re-vision. See the writing in a different way. Sometimes it may be necessary to rewrite the entire piece from a different perspective. It is time consuming when there are deadlines and students become frustrated too with having to do the whole thing again?@!#? So focus on the lead-in; help students to create a better hook for the audience. In this part, try to see the possibilities that could be, if there were something missed, or could it be better.

Editing. This process of editing is done in groups at least the writer and one editor. The main purpose of the group is to support and help the writer. The group has a leader that facilitates and makes sure that everyone is on task, considerate, and not condescending, but truthful. The writer lists specific open-ended questions (i.e. how can...?) about the writing to get authentic feedback from the group members. It does not suffice to simply say “it's good, fine”. They all read and respond to each other building ownership into the process.

Proofreading. Sometimes proofreading can go hand-in-hand with editing. The main goal is to take a final sweep at cleaning up and removing any errors. This step is the least important if the previous three steps are done with consistency.

Finally, the process of revision is taught with the learners ability and comfort level in mind; it is a growth process. Students will not be successful with revisions until they're at a point as a writer to be able to look back, reassess their work, and they have the patience and perseverance to push forward. Certainly, the writing must be important and meaningful to students to want to work with. There will also be a point when they need to be able to walk away from the piece.

Revised Critical Research Question

Originally, my query was on how to develop lyric poetry once students begin writing poems, but it became apparent as I read the articles that there was a more pressing issue with simply getting them started in meaningful interactions with literature and turning them on to poetry would be one avenue to take. So my critical question is:


How can music inspire students to engage themselves with poetry in a purposeful, meaningful and exciting way?

Lesson Plan: Mele Aloha a Lyric Poem

Lesson: Mele Aloha a Lyric Poem

Beatrice Mahi Ravenscraft

length: 90 min

Grade: 7 & 8

HCPS Standards:

7.4.1/8.4.1 Range of Writing: students will write a lyric poem applying different elements of poetry writing

Content Concepts:

• become familiar with mele aloha, the Hawaiian love poem
• understand and apply the elements that make mele aloha into your own mele
• recognize meter in 4/4 verses 3/4
• set your lyric poem to 4/4 meter

GLO's:

• cooperative learner

• critical thinking
• quality producer

Objectives:

Students will

• engage in the creative process of writing lyric poetry using metaphors.
• choose a thing/person that is dear to them, write a lyric poem using a flower or other form of nature as a metaphor of their object of affection.
• set their poem to meter of 4 w/ 2 sets (8 or 16 sub-beats)

Assessment(s) and/or Evaluation:

Resources:

• huapala.org
• He Mele Aloha a Hawaiian songbook
• “He Punahele Nō 'Oe”; na Albert Nāhale'ā (He Mele Aloha)
• “Mele 'Ohana”; na Damon Williams (Ke'alaokamaile CD – keali'i reichel)
• “Lei Ho'oheno”; na Kainani Kahaunaele (Ka Lehua 'Ula CD – Weldon Kekauoha)
• “Lei 'A'ali'i”; na Lucky Hudman a Kealoha'āina (Nā Hulukūpuna CD – Bulla Ka'iliwai)

20 min Beginning Procedures (intro/anticipatory set/connection to prior knowledge)

• sing “He Punahele Nō 'Oe”
• sing “Lei Ho'oheno”
• sing “Lei 'A'ali'i”
• sing “Mele 'Ohana”
• compare translations of mele, look for reoccurring theme, imagery, literary elements
• introduce mele aloha
• listen to mele again for its meter

55 min Middle Procedures (learning activities)

• list things of nature with feminine/masculine traits
• choose your object of affection
• begin composing lyrics using metaphors, images from nature to describe feelings
• consider what kinds of expressions; love, joy, delight, peace, tranquility, honor, respect, loyalty, admiration, desire, hope
• craft a lyric poem in the style of mele aloha
• share composition with elbow group
• choose one from each table to share with class

15 min Closing Procedures:

• review checklist
• self assess your composition
• review lesson objectives
• questions?

Modifications for Diverse Learners:

• for advanced learners analyze your object and the metaphor; determine how much more precise the pairing of the two is in accuracy and specificity
• consider peculiarity, singularity
• work with the rhythmic melodic phrasing
• for those who need make available books on Hawai'i plants and animals with pictures and descriptions for students to reference, or reference books of other areas (i.e. continental US)
• for challenged learners form compatible partnerships
• make a T-chart or double T-chart listing traits to organize possible ideas

Teacher's Reflection on Lesson:

• What worked?
• A favorite part?
• What could be modified?

Inside Out: chapter 7 Growing Toward a Sense of Audience

Inside Out Strategies for Teaching Writing

Chapter 7: Growing Toward a Sense of Audience

“One of the most desirable sensitivities to cultivate in growing writers is a heightened ability to feel an audience as they write.”

To develop a sense of audience, students need to inprove their word choice, organization, imagery and metaphor, and the implicit and explicit messages in their writing. Writing is a communication process. The writer must be able to provide the rhetorical conventions and techniques necessary for the audience to understand the writer's message. It is a cooperative relationship between writer, the writing and the audience that grows stronger. “Effective literature connects and resonates with its reader.” So, good readers read with a writerly perspective, and good writers write with a readerly perspective. In either case they are connecting, interacting with the other, knowing how to say it and knowing what to expect from the piece. Professional writers are tuned-in to their audience, they trust that their audience will laugh, cry, imagine and live if just for a moment in their writing. To develop a sense of audience requires lots and lots of practice.

We must provide many opportunities for our students to play with and practice different styles of writing to adjust to different audiences. No direct teaching can do what real varied practice, peer discussion, audience discussion, and positive teacher response can provide. Often the school structure is too confining to provide young writers the experiences they need. But we can expand their audiences by forming peer response groups, have students write for the school newspaper, literary magazine, for younger students (e.g. elementary age), the local newspaper, or the school or class website.

At first, young writers need to focus on writing for themselves in journals and personal writing, listening to their own voice. Then they can begin to broaden their circle to include their friends and teacher. We need to encourage these audiences to respond positively gently to the students' work. Allow time for writers to adjust and revise their writing to the needs of their audiences. Then begin to widen the circle of audience to include a broader range of student and adult audiences, all the while focusing on adapting their writing to the newer audiences. This could include trusted adults, older adults, younger children, and family. Then they can extend the circle to the general public such as a member of congress or a corporate business person. Again, as the audience becomes more abstract, a greater degree of writing skill is required to meet the demands of a more sophisticated audience.

The use of persuasive techniques adds flair to an author's voice. Sometimes it is necessary to anticipate an audience's response in order for the writer to get his way; a son asking his father for some forbidden thing. Imagine that! This is where a writer can play on his audience's vulnerability, humm. In a prewriting activity, students can predict their audience's needs allowing them to refine their intuitions. Commercials and advertisements are useful tools to use. Have students o a rewrite to target a different audience. Writing for younger children is an excellent way to allow your students to build confidence. It is best to be able to have the groups meet together to share their writing and to interact with the young audience. Good writers make subtle changes and adjustments for their audience. One activity is to role-play a tramatic incident, assign different characters, and see how the different perspectives compare. Try writing a “Why?” letter, “Why?” letters ask to explain a position on a recent decision. Another way to have a real audience is to perform and publish, could be a PTA meeting, assembly, local television or radio show.

Finally, lots of practice struggling with tough ideas and lots of opportunity to share and discover.